As busy women, sometimes developing our relationship with your husband can be difficult to make a priority. Especially after you have children! My husband and I found this out the hard way last year when we let our marriage take the back burner as we adjusted to parenthood. This year, we are attempting re-connect with each other and build our friendship. The following is a list of ideas I complied to improve a marriage by staying connected and improving quality time together.
1. Make time. Sometimes circumstances don’t allow you to have much control of your schedule. However, you can control how you spend your free time. Use it wisely and invest in what matters most.
2. Schedule a Date Night. It is suggested by many marriage counselors that married couples should go out for at least one date night a month, especially if you have kids. I personally think date nights at home (after the children are in bed) can be just as nice and often much less stress than trying to get out. However, getting out once in awhile is important and should be done every once in awhile.
3. Have lunch together. Meet during the day for a meal and conversation. This doesn’t have to expensive or unhealthy. Take your sack lunch to a nearby park instead of heading to a restaurant.
4. Take a walk together. Or go running! This is a great way to relieve stress at the end of the day or help you wake up in the morning. Bring you kids along and make it a family affair.
5. Get up and go to bed at the same time. Try to get on the same sleeping schedule. This can’t always be done (especially once the kids come along), but it’s nice when it happens.
6. Make and pack your spouse’s lunch. Getting up early in the morning to do this really shows your love. Not only that, but you get the opportunity to send them off with a goodbye kiss.
7. Do chores or run errands together. You will find out a lot about your husband’s quirks during these times. And find out that you have some of your own!
8. Set aside time for daily conversation/discussion. Over dinner. After the kid’s are in bed. During a walk. It doesn’t matter when or where, just make sure your are communicating.
9. Play together. Play cards, a board game or video games… or even tag or hide-and-seek. Men love it when their wives make an effort to have fun with them.
10. Get involved with your husband’s hobbies once in awhile. This is especially meaningful if your spouse knows you are not interested in their hobby, but are making an effort.
11. Go to bed early… And don’t go to sleep. We all know sex is an important aspect of marriage. It’s more than just physical. It connects you emotionally and spiritually as well. Try for at least once a week.
12. Make out. Get physical without it leading to sex. During commercial breaks, in the car… you get the idea.
13. Try to take a weekend away. If you plan and save, this is possible. Honestly, I don’t know many people who actually do this more than once a year (if that!), but it’s a nice goal to have.
14. Shower or take a bath together. Enough said.
15. Flirt with each other. Flirting come easily when dating, but often dies a sad, lonely death in marriages. As awkward as it may seem at first, some things that must remain unsaid during the dating and engagement period are not considered inappropriate between a married couple. I’ll leave it at that…
16. Send each other emails, texts, or other messages. Sappy messages or a simple “How’s your day?” are a great way to stay connected when apart. This is especially important if your spouse has to work a lot.
17. Cook a meal together. A fun way to share the load and develop your teamwork skills… Try a new recipe!
18. Read a book together. Take turns reading a chapter out loud. Or read the same book at the same time and discuss. Reading before bed is a great way to relax before trying to sleep.
19. Dance. Take lessons or just turn on music and break out some moves in your living room!
20. Have a Movie Night at home. Or make a day of it and have a Movie Marathon! Turn the phones off, wear something comfortable and snuggle up to a good movie and some popcorn (or whatever you want to eat).
21. Have a candlelight dinner. Don’t save it for your anniversary or Valentine’s Day. Break out the fancy dishes, tablecloth, and wine (or sparkling grape juice) and enjoy a nice, romantic dinner for two.
22. Hold hands often. Have you ever seen an old couple holding hands? It’s the sweetest thing ever! Hugs are nice too… and kisses…
23. Read the Bible together. This is one of the most important things to make time for! Growing in your faith together will strengthen your connection with each other.
24. Memorize Scripture together. Your spouse can be a great accountability partner for this.
25. Pray together. Pray for your marriage. Pray for one another. Pray for you children. Also, be sure to thank God every day for the blessing of your husband.
BONUS TIP: Say “I love you” often. These are the best words to hear from the one with whom you’ve committed to spend the rest of your life. Make a point to say this at least once a day.
While this is not an exhaustive list of the ways to re-connect with your spouse, I hope it will help you to get creative and motivate you to take initiative in building your marriage relationship. Don’t wait for the perfect time, connect with your husband today!
What do you do to stay connected with your husband?
Photo credit: Amanda Eaton Photography
This post is gratefully shared with some of these link-ups.
LOVE THIS LIST!! I came over from Michelle’s Hear it on Sunday community. I’ll be married 30 years this May and can honestly say I am still married to my best friend. We incorporated many of your ideas into our marriage.
Mary recently posted..Why were they chosen?
So glad you enjoyed it, Mary! Thanks for your comment.
pinning
Thanks, Jenna!
This is as practical as it is godly. Thanks!
Grateful you found it useful, Helena! Thanks for stopping by and for your kind comment.
Love this! My favorite tips: Put aside housework/work/computer/blogging and do something together each day – even just 15 minutes. Dream together – think long-term and dream. Research online together. Look at house plans of your dream home. Lastly – have “wine time!” Take wine (or any favorite beverage) and go to bed. Sit in bed and relax, talk, and sip. See where it leads!
Audra recently posted..Bloggers Behaving Badly {When Manners Fail}
Great tips, Audra. Thanks for sharing!
Love this! Such great tips for staying connected. My husband and I enjoy connect time immediately after putting the kids to bed. Every night! It has made a huge difference in our marriage.
Rosann recently posted..“I Love You” – More Than Just Words…
We do the same thing, Rosann! Last year we read through the Bible together and now we are getting ready to go through a catechism.
These are great tips, Jenni! I think these ideas go hand in glove with upcoming Valentines Day, however, they should be things we do all year ’round! Thanks for the gentle nudge and creative ideas! And come on over to Messy Marriage for our very first Wedded Wednesday Link up! I hope you can make it!
Thank you, Beth! I agree that we need to keep these in mind all year long. Thanks for the invite to your link-up!
Stopping over from Wedded Wednesday. Fun post here. One way that we stay connected itby singing together and getting a little involved in each others hobbies. That way we can make time for each other to fit into what we may wan to do personally. We don’t have to everything together but it helps us stay connected.
Stephanie @ Harrington Harmonies recently posted..What to do on bad homeschool days.
Thanks for stopping by and sharing your ideas, Stephanie!
Great List! However I’d like to know why its so important to get up and go to bed at the same time. My husband goes to bed early … too early. I don’t feel tired at 8 p.m. Nor do I feel like getting up at 5 a.m. so I was just wondering about this.
Stephanie Samuel recently posted..Joy to the World
Good questions, Stephanie! I think it depends on the people and situation… Once children come along it’s more difficult to find time to spend together, so many couples like to try to have breakfast together before work or something. Also, it’s easier and more likely that you will have a good physical relationship if you go to bed at the same time.
However, it definitely depends on the couple. Not every suggestions I listed will work for everyone. Thanks for your comment!
Great list! And reminds me we need a date night!
Christina recently posted..Teach Me Jesus Thursdays: The Only Cure
We need to plan one too, Christina! Thanks for the comment.
Love love love these ideas! Sharing with the CMB FB for sure, and pinning, and anything else I can think of
Nikki @ Christian Mommy Blogger recently posted..Fellowship Fridays #22
Thanks, friend! I appreciate it and am glad you enjoyed the post.
I love the tip to run errands together! It is something that my parents did (and still do!).
Thanks for linking up to FFF!
That’s so sweet! Thank you for your comment and for hosting FFF.
Great tips! I feel like we have a great marriage, but it’s always nice to read a few reminders
I’d love it if you’d link up at Off the Hook!
Lauren recently posted..Enjoying the Little Things {A Girl and Her Monkey}
Thanks, Lauren! I always need a little reminder every now and then.
Fun ideas! It’s always good to think about more ways to keep your connection strong
Carolyn @ Pleasantest Thing recently posted..Winter Song: Today is Monday
Thanks, Carolyn!
Reading this posts puts a huge smile on my face. Coming from a husband these are all awesome ideas and gestures of love. There is nothing more fulfilling then having a marriage that honors God and is replete with love and blessings. It’s amazing how many marriages fall short of what they where intended to be. Great Job.. I think it goes both ways and men should step up and realize that the greatest gift they have is laying right next to them in bed every night.
Alex Gutierrez recently posted..My Story
So true! I agree that it is important for both spouses to put forth effort to grow their marriage. However, it is important to remember that our responsibility to respond in love does not depend on the the other person. We must act in obedience to God. Thanks for your comment, Alex!
Love this! I pinned it to my Pinterest board here: http://pinterest.com/3dlessons4life/loving-your-man/
Lyli@3dLessons4Life recently posted..Companion
Thanks so much, Lyli! I’m glad you enjoyed.